How to Get Him to Commit In 5 Effective Steps

Truth is you can’t get a man to commit to you, you can only inspire him to commit to you. As a woman, it is not your responsibility to convince, beg or manipulate a man into wanting to be with you.

For one, because you are too good for that and two because we all know what happens when we are forced to do something, we never really wanted to do in the first place.

We abandon it after a while.

That’s the same with men and commitment. If they can’t see why it is beneficial for them to be in a serious relationship, they won’t commit to one.

What men want in a relationship

The biggest misconception about ‘what men want’ is that a woman needs to be super beautiful, super smart or super successful in order for a man to commit. Lies!

How often do we see couples, where we ask ourselves ‘what does she have that I don’t?’.

First off, girl don’t be a hater. Secondly, comparison is the thief of joy, so stop! And lastly, most likely nothing.

Truth is for a man to desire to commit, he actually looks at the quality of the relationship you can offer him and that oftentimes has nothing to do with your appearance, but with the type of woman you are.

While appearance is what will attract a man to you, your character is what will inspire him to commit.

However, as a woman, you can ignite the desire for commitment in a man. Here are 5 effective steps on how to get him to commit.

1. Self-Confidence

There is nothing worse for a man than a woman who is desperate to be in a relationship. Because that woman communicates to him that she lacks self-respect and will do and accept anyone and anything to be in a relationship.

A woman who is self-confident and knows her God-given value, on the other hand, is what makes a man want to commit the most. The fact that she has her own identity and happiness outside of him, encourages him to commit to her.


Because it takes the pressure off of him to be her source of fulfillment and gives him the certainty that both of them will be able to pour into the relationship and elevate his life.

2. Giving him Space

A close second after self-confidence is, whether or not a woman is clingy/needy. Men need a sense of freedom even when they are in a committed relationship. They don’t want to feel like they are losing their identity, because they started dating.

Therefore, one thing you can do is to give him space by continuing to live your own best life. Even if you are already dating or have just met, don’t give up on all your plans, passions and projects for him.

Doing that will ensure you stay sane and he will be inspired to commit because you are showing him that being in a relationship doesn’t mean giving up who you are.

3. Connect emotionally

My number 1 relationship advice for women who are wondering how to get a guy to commit exclusively is to build an emotional connection with a man through vulnerability.

Vulnerability is a powerful tool that allows healthy couples to open up to each other by creating a safe space.

In comparison to women, most men do not have an emotional support system. They do not have the sister, cousin or best friend that they can open up to.

As a consequence, a lot of men never explore or deal with their fears, worries or pain.

As a woman, you have the opportunity to create a safe space for the man you like to express his feelings, by being vulnerable yourself and showing him that he doesn’t need to be perfect around you.

And when a man feels safe enough with you to be vulnerable you become special to him. So special it will make him want you as a girlfriend/wife because he fears to lose you.

He will want to hold on to you even if that means giving up his beloved bachelor life and instead commit to a relationship/ commit to marriage.

How to Get Him to Commit In 5 Effective Steps

4. Set and maintain healthy boundaries

Contrary to popular belief, clearly communicating what you expect in a relationship to the man you are dating, is good.

In order to gain a man’s respect and interest, you should communicate your standards and boundaries in a respectful and feminine way right from the beginning. Equip him with the necessary knowledge and tools to successfully pursue you.

Let him know politely, what you expect from him in a dating, committed or marriage relationship and tell him what you will provide in return.

Let him show you that he understood what is required of him before you increase your attention, your interest and your emotional investment in the relationship.  

The right man will feel inspired and encouraged to commit to you and the wrong man will run for the hills. It’s a win-win situation!

5. Upgrade his life

Okay, this one might seem a little much to you all but it’s easier than you think.

The only reason why anyone, no matter if male or female, should ever want to leave singleness and decide to enter a committed relationship is because one relationship status upgrades the other.

Meaning that being with you should be better for him than being alone. More fun, more purpose, more love. Simple.

Therefore, my last tip on how to get a man to commit to you is to upgrade his life, by showing him that your presence adds value.

Now, I don’t want you to change who you are in order to appeal to a man. Instead, I want you to be 100% your true self and let him experience the quirky, goofy and emotional you.

Only then will he be able to discern whether you are someone he wants to add to his life or not and inspired to take it to the next level.

Dating nowadays can be tricky and confusing but does not have to be. There are different ways to master the dating scene, but the most effective way on how to get a man to commit is by being the most confident version of yourself.

Become the one that attracts the one and learn how to naturally inspire a man’s desire for commitment.

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