When God tells you to let go of someone
How do you know when God tells you to let go of someone? That is a common question that I get on my blog.
Because just like me, many of you want to make sure that you are dating with purpose and following the will of God. Especially, when it comes to your romantic relationships.
And letting go of someone you love is one of the hardest things many of us will ever have to do.
Especially if you created a soul tie to each other.
You love him so much that the idea of letting go makes you feel anxious, stressed, and emotional.
After all, you don’t want to risk losing “The One”. And more importantly, you don’t want to risk losing the relationship you worked so hard on.
How do you know if God is telling you to leave a relationship?
If you have ever been in a situation where you felt like God is telling you to end a relationship but you also desperately wanted to make your relationship work, then you already know that it’s not fun.
To the contrary, it’s actually pretty horrible.
Because when God is telling you to leave a relationship you will sense it. He is going to introduce a sense of discomfort into your relationship, where your spiritual growth will be hindered if you don’t listen to him.
You will keep coming across bible verses or sermons that point to the inevitable. And the longer you avoid letting go of the relationship, the more complicated it will get.
And I know it firsthand. Because I had a hard time trusting God when a relationship ended.
It’s like the famous Oprah quote:
“Life always whispers to you first, but if you ignore the whisper, sooner or later you’ll get a scream.”
There are always clear signs God is telling you to let go of someone. And to help you identify them I’m sharing 4 signs that will help you discern when God tells you to let go of someone.
How do you know if God wants you to let go of someone?
1. You have a feeling
Whenever God tells you to let go of someone, he will show you very subtle signs in the beginning. Oftentimes through something as simple as your gut feeling and intuition.
Yes, you and I both have an intuition, whose primary job is to keep us from harm. And I know that to some people that might sound very vague and strange.
However, it is not.
When you accept Christ Jesus as your savior, the Holy Spirit comes to live in your heart and guides you through life. He is the one that helps you discern right from wrong and connect to God on a personal level.
And the more connected you are to Him, the easier it becomes to discern if God put someone in your life or not.
Therefore, if you have a feeling that something is off with your boyfriend and do not have perfect peace about the relationship, then trust that feeling.
Trust that Jesus Christ is leading you in this situation and giving you subtle signs to move on. And I know a lot of times it’s hard to accept it because you are afraid of letting go of someone you love.
But take heart. When you let go and let God write your love story you allow Him to give you His best for you.
2. He disregards your boundaries
Boundaries are very important in a relationship. They protect your well-being and serve as a measuring tool for respect.
Maybe he doesn’t honor your vow of celibacy, or maybe he doesn’t care for your romantic needs.
If your boyfriend crosses your boundaries every time and it makes you feel uncomfortable, then that is how you know when God is telling you to let go of someone.
A relationship in which you repeatedly feel disrespected, bad about yourself, or can’t be authentic is not a healthy relationship. He is simply not the right person for you and God has a better plan for you.
You want to be in a relationship where you feel respected and like you are being heard. And yes, letting go of someone you love is heartbreaking at worse, but that is still not as dangerous as losing yourself.
So, if he disregards your boundaries it might be time to go separate ways.
3. You don’t enjoy your time together
I’m a firm believer that a relationship should be fun! Yes, fun!
Meaning you and your man should feel like you are best friends and enjoying your time together. Maybe not all the time, but most of it.
And I would argue that if you are not having fun, then you are unequally yoked. Yes ladies you can be unequally yoked, even if both of you are Christians.
Because there can be a multitude of reasons why you don’t enjoy hanging out with each other.
Maybe because you are not attracted to each other physically, mentally, or emotionally. Maybe because you have nothing in common and every time you meet there is little to talk about.
Or maybe because you have different values and now most of your hangouts end in arguments.
All of these reasons can be a sign that is telling you to let go of the relationship.
Because the truth is, God will send you a man that you enjoy spending time with. And even though the relationship may not be perfect, it will feel easy, loving, and fun!
4. You constantly feel stressed
Be honest with yourself. Are you holding on to a man that you don’t trust and are worried about all the time?
Feeling anxious, distrustful, and overwhelmed are not the emotions that describe love.
They are actually red flags in Christian dating. And if that is how you are feeling in your current relationship then you want to rethink that.
When God wants you to be with someone you will feel at peace, loved, and aligned in your relationship. However, if you constantly feel stressed then it simply means he is not the one.
A relationship that is a constant source of anxiety is not good for you and definitely not what your heavenly father intended for you.
So, truly ask yourself if you are more in love with the idea of who he could be than who he really is and if that is worth your mental health.
Remember that God is always speaking to you. Sometimes he will speak through very subtle signs such as feelings and emotions.
And sometimes he will use very obvious signs, such as people or situations.
5. You are forced to let go
I am a big believer that God’s design for marriage is to bring two people together for a specific purpose. And these two people will be aligned in every area of their lives.
They will have the same goals, the same vision for their future, and the same values.
That’s why a simple way God will tell you to walk away, is if you are being pulled in different directions.
Maybe he got a new career opportunity and long distance is no option for you. Or maybe he doesn’t want marriage anytime soon and that’s a real problem for you.
Whatever it is, for some reason God is showing you that he won’t be part of your next chapter. And as hard as it may be to accept that, trust God with your next steps and you will see good things unfold.
Bible verses about letting go of someone you love
As I mentioned in the beginning when God tells you to let go of someone you might question God’s love for you.
Because you are upset he’s taking away your heart’s desire. But that’s when you have to remind yourself that everything works together for your good when it’s God’s plan.
God’s design for our life is perfect and oftentimes requires us to let go of control. And the best way to surrender and trust in God’s word.
Here are a few bible verses about letting go of someone you love, that have helped me before.
Trust in the Lord with all your heart and lean not on your own understanding; in all your ways submit to him, and he will make your paths straight.
See, I am doing a new thing! Now it springs up; do you not perceive it? I am making a way in the wilderness and streams in the wasteland.
2 Corinthians 4:18
So we fix our eyes not on what is seen, but on what is unseen, since what is seen is temporary, but what is unseen is eternal.