Will God bring my ex-boyfriend back?
The most painful part about a breakup is oftentimes the uncertainty. Especially, if you didn’t want the relationship to end. Deep down you are hoping that the relationship can be salvaged and the love re-instated.
So, in your desperation, you start to look for signs, advice, and hints to the most important question: “Will God reunite me with my ex?”.
That was also one of the many questions I asked myself last year.
Even though it had already been more than a year since our amicable breakup, I was still wondering whether we had a chance of rekindling our love.
After all, we did not break up because we hated each other or someone cheated, but simply because he had moved to New York City for work, while I remained in Atlanta.
So, nothing bad. Nothing that we couldn’t fix.
Well, besides the fact that by now I was a digital nomad in Medellin, Colombia with no foreseeable return to the United States of America anytime soon.
But still. We had a very strong soul tie which made it seem like we were never truly apart. Without each other, our lives just never felt really whole.
But back to the reason why I’m writing this post.
Does God bring couples back together?
If you are asking yourself “Does God bring couples back together?” Then I can confidently say “yes…if the relationship is according to His purpose for your life“.
And I know that this answer is not very comforting, because you don’t have a guarantee that your ex is part of God’s plan for you.
None of us knows what is.
And if you have been broken up for a while, you start to wonder whether that relationship is meant to be at all.
To give you a tiny bit of comfort during this time, I decided to share 5 signs that God will restore your dating relationship.
Why does God put someone into your life?
It’s important to remember that just like God brought you and your (ex-)boyfriend together the first time around, he can also bring the two of you together again if that is in his will.
In a blog post, I wrote a couple of years ago, titled: “Why God will sometimes end a relationship” I explain in detail why a breakup isn’t always a bad thing.
When we idolize the relationship, are not ready for the relationship, or the relationship was solely built on infatuation, we have to trust that God broke it up for a good reason.
And I know it is not easy to accept that, because we want what we want. However, as Christian, we have to make sure that our desire for God is bigger than the desires of our flesh.
Truth is, I have seen God restoring dating relationships over and over again. Once both people were mature enough and ready to step into his purpose for their lives, they would find their way back to each other.
No matter the time that has passed.
I, myself have experienced that. My boyfriend and I broke up two years ago and found our way back to each other recently. Even though I had appreciated a faster reconciliation God brought us back together in his timing.
So, we have to understand that nothing God does happens because WE want it. It happens because God has a plan that is unfolding with us in it.
And sometimes that plan involves a second chance with your ex-boyfriend.
When can God bring someone back into your life?
1. When you are ready for each other / a relationship
As I mentioned above, some relationships end because you simply got together prematurely.
Maybe the relationship was built on lust, or both of you were not yet willing to commit. Whatever it was, for some reason you were not ready to serve each other as partners and broke up.
However, once both of you have done the inner work and are ready to commit to a relationship, God may bring your ex back into your life. Because the truth is, there is a difference between wanting a relationship and being truly ready for a relationship.
As a single woman, you want to ensure that your heart, body, and mind are ready to receive the man God has for you at any time, otherwise you risk losing him the moment he appears.
A good way to do that is by seeking guidance. You can do that through reading, talking to wise council, or getting coaching. There are many steps you can take now that will help you get ready.
2. When you become the best partner possible
Another common reason why relationships end is that we are too self-centered, immature, or disrespectful.
Let’s be real, not everyone knows how to be a good girlfriend or boyfriend. As a matter of fact, most people don’t even know how to be a good friend in general.
You may have had selfish tendencies, been argumentative, or even lacked self-esteem in the past.
All these things can seriously harm and sabotage a relationship.
However, if you have done some work on yourself and grown as a person things can change. Your ex-boyfriend is just as much a child of God as you are. Therefore, God will only want you to get back together with your ex, once you are His best as well.
It is crucial that you use your season of separation to identify the reasons why you broke up and then do the work it takes to become a better partner.
3. When the relationship is no longer an idol
For a lot of single women, being in a relationship or getting married is very important. So much so that it can easily become an idol and we accept anything or anyone in order to get the title.
Before God can bring you two back together, you will need to completely surrender your relationship and your ex-boyfriend to him.
If you still experience emotional breakdowns and depression because of the breakup, then it’s an indication that you are still too invested.
The goal is to feel and complete even now without him. That way, whether he comes back or not, you know you will be fine.
Because only if your desire for God is stronger than your desire to be with him you will have a God-honoring relationship.