How God leads you to your spouse
One of the many questions I receive on this blog is: How do I know if he is “The One” God has for me?
This is a question I always find hard to answer. Because I truly believe that there is no such thing as one-size-fits-all when it comes to God’s will. If there was then the world would look a lot different.
However, just like I discuss in many other blog posts and videos when God tells you something it comes with signs and wonders. Including when he introduces you to your future spouse.
And to help you understand how he does it, I figured I’d share 5 very popular bible stories to show you how God leads you to your spouse.
Can God reveal your spouse to you?
The short answer is “Yes!”. God can reveal your spouse to you!
A lot of times he does it through an instant soul tie. A connection that is so strong that you just know the friendship is different. Because you feel comfortable, joyful and like yourself around him.
Something I have experienced myself. Sounds odd right? But it’s true!
God is more obvious than we often assume, and the holy spirit is more present than we often realize. If God’s plan for you in this season is to be married, then he will show you the right person in different ways.
How God leads you to your spouse
1. You will see clear signs
I always love reading the story of Rebekah at the well in Genesis 24:11–20. Unbeknownst to her, she exhibited the exact behavior that Eliezer, the servant of Abraham, had prayed for moments prior.
At the well, she demonstrated an attitude of service and kindness, which is what he asked to see to identify the right woman.
In today’s culture, many Christian singles doubt God’s ability to provide exactly what it is we need in a future husband. We are so afraid of being too specific and demanding, thus “missing our blessing”, that we abandon our requirements altogether and settle for what we can get.
But that’s not the way to go either.
Yes, you should avoid unrealistic expectations, but don’t get rid of them because you don’t believe God can meet them.
God is very capable to provide the desires of your heart, including a happy marriage to a godly man.
When God confirms your spouse to you, you will recognize him because of some of the godly characteristics you asked for. And that will make things even more clear and more obvious.
2. It will feel right
The next bible story that shows how God leads you to your spouse is Adan and Eve’s.
I mean, there is no way on earth that Adam knew what he was talking about when he said: “This is now bone of my bones and flesh of my flesh; she shall be called ‘woman,’ for she was taken out of man.” in Genesis 2:23.
I mean homeboy had been around for 6 days and definitely did not know what the inside of his body looked like.
Can’t fool me lol.
Nevertheless, at the end of the day, he indeed did say it. Without knowing, he knew that Eve was his (soul)mate.
He could feel that she was different from the animals that have been presented to him before.
And that’s what I truly believe happens when you meet your specific person. You will know and he will know!
Maybe not on the first encounter, but there will be a moment when you can sense an overwhelming knowing that someone is for you.
The connection that the two of you share will just feel right and awaken your spirit to recognize his. It will feel like you were made out of the same cloth and being together is natural.
3. You won’t feel awkward
We all know the story of Ruth. I mean it’s a Christian women’s bible study must. Ruth was a brave woman that was not afraid to hustle to save her own life and that of her mother-in-law.
That’s why we see her doing something highly unusual in Ruth 3:7-13. She sleeps at the feet of Boaz, a relative of Ruth’s father-in-law.
If that isn’t courageous and borderline stalker-ish then I don’t know.
But the crazy thing is, Boaz was not irritated but impressed by it. So much so that he went down to the town gate the next day to advocate for Naomi and take Ruth as a wife.
Ruth’s courageous but very awkward act ended up being what got her the outcome she needed to survive.
And that needs to be a lesson for us.
When God shows you who to marry, He will send you a man that you feel courageous and empowered. You will feel confident enough to speak your truth and feel safe enough to ask for what it is you need.
4. It will be life-giving
Now here is the thing. We can all agree that life without romantic love is still worth living. However, we can also honestly say that having true love makes life even more enjoyable.
It’s no secret that when you are in love you suddenly dance, sing, smile, and skip from time to time.
It’s because your brain is releasing a bunch of neurotransmitters that make you happier and feel great.
Being in love enhances your experience of life. It makes you feel more alive. Suddenly the days become more purposeful, your time more precious, and your thoughts more vivid.
Life starts to feel more fun!
That is what the book of Song of Songs is all about. It’s a massive poem or love song between two lovers.
Throughout the book, the man and the woman speak about how their love for each other makes them rejoice and celebrate life.
And that’s what it feels like when God leads you to your spouse!
Little mundane tasks and even challenges will matter less.
You will find yourself in a constant state of excitement about love, but also life. You will be excited about spending time with him for the rest of your life.
5. It won’t feel rushed
Of course, I could not end this blog post without citing the original definition of love.
1 Corinthians 13, starts with the famous words “love is patient, love is kind”.
The most important signs that God will use when He confirms your husband, is that the love will feel patient and kind.
From the introduction all the way to the first day of your future marriage. Nothing will feel rushed.
Everything will happen in God’s perfect timing. You won’t feel the need to abandon your own needs or boundaries. But feel supported and encouraged.
Furthermore, patience will also serve as a sign that God is preparing you for marriage. Because you will feel at peace with where you are in life and not be stressed about your future husband’s whereabouts.
How do you know when God sends your husband?
As mentioned before, the biggest indicator of how God leads you to your spouse is peace. A peace that surpasses all understanding (Philippians 4:7).
Which is something I can attest to in my own love life.
My boyfriend and I have inner peace when it comes to our relationship. Which I cannot say about my past relationships with different people. These relationships did not have peace, because of too many loose ends.
Every little change or challenge would make me feel worried, anxious, and insecure.
The men I was dating were not ready to commit and deep down I knew God was telling me to let go. So I had no peace.
This time it’s different. He is older, more aware of what he wants, and has a genuine desire to be in a serious relationship.
Now there is peace. I don’t worry. I don’t stress. And I don’t allow my own insecurities and fears to sabotage my own relationship.
Instead, I just remember God’s word and trust that one day you will be someone’s future wife. And while you wait patiently, remember to pray for your single season to be edifying.
I hope these 5 points and my personal love story helped you get an idea about how God leads you to your spouse. For more thoughts on this topic, check out the posts below.