3 Reasons why your boyfriend won’t propose
If you have found your way to this blog post, then I know you are not feeling too good.
Because you are most likely waiting for a marriage proposal with no luck, and that wait often accompanies feeling like you are not good enough.
Well, the truth is, you are good enough. But you may be in a relationship that is not right for you.
How do I know? Because I have been in such a relationship before too.
A long time ago, before I truly believed in my self-worth and understood the value I added to a man’s life. I wasted my time waiting for my ex. Fore more than three years we were on-again, off-again until I realized he was not my future husband and eventually left.
Looking back now, I understand why a lot of men don’t propose and today I am sharing with you three possible reasons why your boyfriend is not proposing.
1) You are not demanding marriage
Reason number one why your boyfriend hasn’t proposed yet is because you allow him to. You are not demanding marriage, so he does not see the need to.
The bottom line is that as a woman, you set the pace for a relationship. You tell him what you want and it’s up to a man to meet your requirement or not. Never the other way around.
But if you are anything like I used to be in my previous relationship, then you might be scared to say what you really want out of fear that he will leave if you do. I get that.
But the worst thing you can do is to allow your fear to get in the way of your future plans. That will only breed anxiety and eventually lead to resentment.
Instead, you have to put yourself and your dreams first. After all, as women, we have a biological clock, and wanting to be a wife and have a family gets harder the older we get.
So you have to muster up the courage to talk about the topic of marriage with your boyrfiend and apply a little bit of pressure.
2) He knows he does not want to marry you.
The second reason why your boyfriend hasn’t bought you a diamond engagement ring yet after years of dating is that he knows deep down that you are not “The One”.
And I know this hurts. But I truly believe that there are two types of women in a man’s life. The comfort girl and the dream girl.
The comfort girl is the woman who ticks enough boxes for him to stay around. She is nice, she is pretty, she is patient. But she does not rock his boat.
She is the girl who finds herself in a long-term relationship with no proposal, often due to low self-esteem.
And then there is the dream girl. She is beautiful, and kind, and most importantly, she knows her worth.
She is the girl who gets married within 2 years or less because she doesn’t accept relationship stagnation.
If you are not his dream girl, he may already subconsciously know that he does not want to marry you. Instead he is coasting, because he is comfortable with the level of commitment you two have right now, but not willing to take the next step.
3) He is not ready
The last reason why men delay proposing is simply because they are not ready yet.
That often happens to young couples. A man who is not in his dream job or has not reached his career goals yet, may feel like he isn’s ready yet. He may feel like his life goals and personal growth take priority.
And while this reason may feel like the most innocent one, I believe it is the most dangerous one.
Because that is when we end up dating the guy with potential for years hoping for the perfect proposal one day. Unfortunately, I’ve been there and would not advise!
Your boyfriend may not mean bad, but his indecisiveness will lead to a lot of anxiety for you and mean that your life and your timeline are up to him.
Instead, you need to get back into the driver seat of your life and decide what is more important to you. Being with him or being in a successfuol marriage with a person that is ready to spend the rest of your life with you.
What did I do when my Ex-boyfriend didn’t want to propose?
In 2021 I had an important decision to make. Do I stay with my on-again off-again boyfriend of 3 years or end the relationship.
After having multiple discussions about marriage, it had become clear that he still didn’t feel ready to get married. I was 32 at the time and felt betrayed, because we had been through so much together and his continous rejection made me feel like I was not good enough.
And I knew the relationship was slowly eating at me.
So I started to prepare for what I knew had to happen. We needed to go separate ways once and for all.
Over the course of 4 weeks I prepared myself emotionally and mentally. I talked to friends and family about my decision, knowing I would need their support. I took a small solo trip to clear my head and pour into myself.
And lastly, I ended things and went full no-contact.
That was one of hardest things I ever had to do. A lot of tears and a lot of pain, but I knew it was the right decision and would eventually lead to my ultimate goal – marriage.
Less than 12 months later I went on my first date with Ken, who was ready for a long-term commitment and planned a beautiful proposal 18 months later.
If you want to learn more about my relationship testimony, then make sure to sign up for my newsletter.
Love & Light,
Justine
